Happy 8th Birthday Kiwi Hannah!!

Big Sister Day was today! I cried a lot of tears, starting with the first message I got from my dear friend Ashley and ending with the last message I got from my best friend forever Val and everyone in between (special shout-out to Bethy, who started the tears early yesterday)!

During dinner, I cried about her orchid needing to be replanted, and our sweet Kobi placed her hand on my shoulder and said, “express it,” William got me a tissue and listened to what I was asking, so I just cried until I was satisfied!

There was no countdown leading up to this day, and there was no visible rainbow seen today (my physical sign that she’s near), but the love was plentiful and tangible, and that’s all a grieving mama could ever ask for!

So, for those that wished Kiwi a happy birthday, that acknowledged today being Big Sister Day, that sent texts, messages, and comments and likes on our posts and stories: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for remembering my first baby girl today!!

The day wasn’t a complete wash; we ate good food, painted ceramics, ate popcorn, had Starbucks, I went to see The Woman King, we sang happy birthday, and had cupcakes way past bedtime! We celebrated today, and everything wasn’t perfect, but it was perfect for us!! Happy 8th Birthday, Kiwi Hannah; mommy, daddy, and sissy love you!!

Healing Has Taken Place: Happy 7th Birthday Kiwi Hannah

Today was a mellow day full of simple joys. We slept in, got our nails done, had dinner and several cheesecakes! We looked through Kiwi’s book and talked. This year, we saw her all month long in different ways at different times and we’d say hi and smile! So it felt like a month long celebration this year!

I miss that little girl so much every day, but this year it didn’t break me, and for that, I am grateful! Happy 7th Birthday, my dear Kiwi Hannah! Mommy, Daddy, and Sissy love you!

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Happy 12 Year Anniversary

Today is our anniversary!! We have been married for 12 years. It seems like we were such babies when we were first married.

We’ve been through so much, and I am thankful that we’ve stuck together through it all. I love you, William, and I love being married to you!

Thank you for your continued love and belief in me. I look forward to growing older with you each year, and I look forward to continuing to learn about you as time goes on. Thank you for being my knight in shining armor all those years ago, and thank you for being the perfect husband just for me!

~Love Terri

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We celebrated all weekend and it was perfect!

Happy 5th Birthday, Kobi

My love, you are our greatest treasure and our miracle, answer to prayer! Thank you for showing us every day how to love each other, how to communicate better, and how to serve each other well.

My Dearest Kobi! We love you and are so grateful for you! Happy Birthday! We made and decorated your cake, we went to breakfast, had lots of phone calls, pizza for dinner, ate the cake, opened up presents and enjoyed our books, unicorn decor, and balloons!

You are such a ball of energy and joy I can’t fully comprehend how I’m supposed to steward all of your talent, treasure, and power in such a short amount of time, but I promise to keep trying every day to love you well and to open the door for you to walk through and follow your dreams!

Happy Happy Birthday, may this be the year you find your joy and passions, and may you know the Lord for yourself in a more profound way! Keep growing and Keep shining!

Love Mom!!

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Big Six: It’s Big Sister Day

Today did not go as planned. We wanted to go to the bike trail and the beach, but it rained all day. Luckily for me, I could get up and do some yoga right at 5:34 am when Kiwi Hannah was born. I took some time to cry, pray, and cry some more and move my body so that I could celebrate today!

Maybe the continual rain was Kiwi’s way of crying because she missed us just as much as we missed her. Perhaps it was her way of telling me she understands how much I love and miss her every day!

I don’t know, but we tried to make the most of it. We had donuts with Claire and Derek, got some errands done, had the most beautiful orchid delivered to us, ate cake, walked through the new place we’re renting, had dinner and dessert, then came home.

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How we celebrated Big Sister Day!

I’m thankful I made it this far, this many years, without Kiwi here on this earth. It’s a trauma I’m still healing from, one I know I won’t ever fully get over but instead be able to see it as a life event worth celebrating! I mean, Kiwi is living her best life with Jesus!

Happy sixth birthday, Kiwi! Mommy, Daddy, and Sissy love you!