A congested baby

Y’all so the time as come where Kobi doesn’t feel good and there isn’t much I can do about it… I mean at least when she’s been teething I can put some Ambesol on her gums, but her being congested has been the worse. We (William and I) have been tag teaming her nose to make sure it stays clear and that seems to cause her so much pain…

 Like screams, real tears, and face changing colors! It breaks my heart every time. But I know that’s all we can do besides hooking up the humidifier (which we’ve also done)… I do know about the streamed up bathroom but we haven’t used that just yet… We’re praying whatever this is runs its course quickly and doesn’t linger! 
How do you deal with a congested baby? Any tips or tricks I’m missing?

Church family picnic

Today was our church family picnic and it was so much fun! The food was good. We met a bunch of new people. And saw a couple of friends and even got to know some of the people we already knew better! Kobi did great and she met a few new people as well! 

My favorite part was when I got to double dutch for the first time in a very very long time like 15-ish years, and I got in on the first try and stayed in for a little while too! It was so much fun!! Then William got to participate in the Bethel Olympics and he did the obstacle course that almost killed him but he made it through and his team ended up winning that event!!

Sometimes it’s just a good idea to get out of your comfort zone and get to know the people that you see every Sunday but don’t always get to connect with… And since we just transitioned to this church a few months ago it was a great time to do just that! 

Date Night Tonight!!

Y’all I am so excited! William and I are going to have a date night by ourselves tonight! We are suppose to go to the movies and maybe grab something to eat. Or maybe we’ll go play Pokemon and grab some coffee. I’m just excited to spend some alone time with William before it’s bed time! I’m gonna get all dolled up and make sure we get a decent picture together too! 

We’ve gone on plenty of dates since Kobi came along (except to the movies so we may really follow through with that) and we haven’t had any major issues with bringing her because it allows us to be a family, which is something we’ve wanted for a while. However, tonight will only be the second time we’ve left her in the care of someone and went out together!

With me starting school and us both working along with the rest of the responsibilities we have the plan is to try to have a date night (even if it’s just at the house) at least once a week! 

What are some things you do for date night?

The Food Adventures of Kobi: Greenbeans

So after she was a little constipated after the apples we momentarily halted feeding Kobi food… But we decided that it was time to try again so we gave her some greenbeans. We tried for a couple of days and she does not like them, like at all! She cried the whole time I tried feeding her. It was so pitiful I eventually just gave up and gave her the bottle so she could get something in her belly. 

I know she got some of the greenbeans down but it just wasn’t worth it but we will revisit the greenbeans in a couple of months maybe when she can have table foods she will enjoy them a little more! Who knows…

What was your experience with greenbeans?

7 Sticky Pounds

That’s all I have left of my baby weight from Kobi… 7 sticky won’t leave pounds! I’m trying not to be so hard on myself but I’m just not happy about how I look… Maybe because all of those seven pounds are in my gut… And there’s not enough time or budget at this moment that would let me compensate my new sillouhette with new clothes. I received some new to me pieces and they have worked wonderfully and then some of them are like what were you thinking… They just aren’t flattering… Like at all, I mean they could be with expensive undergarments on that sucked and tucked but I don’t want to wear those on a daily basis… I mean who does… How do they breath, eat, survive after using the restroom? 

So instead I’m going to start consistently working out again and incorporating more cardio into my workouts… I’m gonna continue drinking water but up my amounts and lay off the sugars during the week accept in my coffee which isn’t every day anyway and I’m going to continue to eat healthier and of course lift weights when I can.

 I know that as I get older shedding pounds gets harder so if I get into a routine now maybe by next summer (my birthday) I’ll be where I want to be weight wise and be living a healthier lifestyle all together!  It’s gonna take some dedication and some early mornings but it’s gonna be worth it in the end when I can wear whatever I want and not worry about any extra anything sticking out anywhere!

What are some of your favorite workouts?

Kobi is right where she is suppose to be!

Today we had Kobi’s developmental NICU followup appointment in Nashville and I didn’t really know what to expect. But they weighed her and measured her and ran some tests. Now before I tell you what they said I have always thought that besides her weight Kobi was where she was suppose to be development wise. I don’t know if people just agreed with me because I’m her mom or if they really believed it… So technically Kobi is 3 months and 28 days old adjusted age so that’s what they were testing her skills at. 

Kobi was above average for her adjusted age and well within the average range for her chronological age, which means Kobi is exactly where she is suppose to be! The doctor said it had everything to do with how well William and I work with her but I know that our work is only a portion of the answer because the bigger part of why Kobi is doing so well is because God is a miracle worker and has kept and made sure Kobi was good every step of the way! 

He has made this little girl strong and smart and beautiful and kind and patient and joyful! He speaks to her and the Holy Spirit teaches her because we invite Him into our lives and give Him access to the things He needs in order to work and Kobi is no different. Every night we pray for her and ask the Lord to continue to speak to her, teach her and strengthen her and He has done just that and more! 

Kobi won’t have her next appointment for another six months and if she is doing well then her next appointment won’t be until she’s two! We are already praying and believing that Kobi will stay on course and continue to improve at the rate she is suppose to be at! Thank you all for your continued prayers and support! And when I buy more storage (it costs $100) I will upload the pictures we took of her from this visit!

Hiding feelings don’t work 

Y’all I have tried hiding my feelings of missing Kiwi for the last two weeks and it just has not worked! I tried to tell myself that I was too busy to miss her so I continued doing what I had been doing. But the thing about grief is that it has no other place to go so it will continue to linger and now I find myself on an emotional roller coaster of sorts.

 I look at Kobi and I’m so happy and grateful and then she’ll do something and I’ll get sad because I’ll think about where Kiwi would have been. I didn’t even tell William and the when I tried he was already sleep so it came as a surprise to him when I started talking and crying about how I missed our daughter! 

My attempt to hide my feelings wasn’t very fair to anyone. I would have never been too busy to tend to Kiwi so I should never think I’m too busy to allow myself to feel all the feels and emotions that come with missing her! I’m still grieving! It’s not nearly as debilitating as it once was and it’s a little easier to move on after a good cry but I have to let myself have a good cry in order to do so! 

And I’m sure William felt a little lost and helpless at my sudden change in mood and demeanor. It’s hard for me to let myself grieve in front of him because we grieve so differently. I know that us grieving differently is okay I just don’t want to hold anything against him for doing it so differently… After all we’re talking about raw emotions and I’d hate to say something in the heat of the moment that didn’t need to be said.

Yesterday at church we were singing that song “better is one day in your courts, better is one day in your house, better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere”and it hit me that Kiwi is in His courts right now and that is so much better than having her here with me for thousands of days! I know she’s doing far better than her almost two year old self would be doing here with us and I know she is way more loved because she gets to spend her days with Jesus and has gotten to spend every day since she was born with Him. It helped me to understand that she’s much better where she is even though I can’t find the words to describe how much I love and miss her!

So I guess what I am trying to say is when the feelings come let them come, allow yourself to feel every last bit of them. Don’t try to deny them because that only makes things worse. And know that grief is a process that can’t be hurried along like someone getting into your thanksgiving pies! It’s gonna come when it wants to and when it knows it’s time for you to release some of those emotions you’ve been holding on to and it’s just best you let it come to do what it came to do; which is help heal you!