Where to go from here?

This month is over! There was so much stuff going on I really don’t know what my focus should be for the coming month. Trying to find the balance between work and life has been unattainable and will probably remain as such forever, but my goal is to be at least 60/40 at any given moment. Therapy is still much needed. I actually had fun doing our budget and keeping track of what was going on with our money at any given moment. It actually brought about a freedom I don’t think I’ve felt in a long time when it comes to money. It would be nice to add another date night into the budget as well as a few other line items. I want to start running again, and continue to be mindful of what I put into my body mainly dairy and processed sugars. I want to get to bed at a decent time again, instead of past midnight. I really want to refocus and readjust my goals going into the last 3 months of the year and I want to continue to go deep with Jesus and His word. I didn’t really narrow anything down, but I do know that I feel much better about going into this new month with a fresh perspective and newly outfitted goals! Thanks again for your support and encouragement!

Runners in the making

Tonight I went on a run with Kobi, and a few women from MOPS and church that I met. It was the first time I’ve run outside/with others since I left Oregon and it felt so good! Not to mention I was so proud of Kobi who ran most of the way and l only stopped a couple of times and even then it wasn’t that long.

Kobi hydrating after our run

It was her first time running for fun and it was my first time being brave enough to run with her as a form of exercise and not just a quick race. I’m proud of me too. I didn’t want to go because I’m so tired and I had already gotten a workout in earlier in the day and it was dark and Bill wasn’t home yet, but I stuck to my word and showed up and I had a great time! I’m excited to see how we improve as we continue to show up!

I got home and checked my Facebook memories and found this picture from four years ago:

I realized looking at this memory that I had just found out I was pregnant with Kobi in this picture and so “we” ran this fun run way back then and we just so happened to run together again tonight!

What a cool little memory. I am so happy that I showed up and fought through the sleepy whiny kid and my excuses because I love when things line up like this and Jesus knew that, and did I mention I actually had fun and don’t feel horrible after running?!

I am excited to see where this running thing takes us, as individuals and as running buddies. As I watched her run and love winning and struggle when our friends left us, I realized that she had no clue how well she’d actually done and how if we keep running she’ll get it and she’ll only get better.

Our time and distance to beat next time

Then I realized as I was talking to my dad that if I could have believed in myself when I ran track as much as I believe in myself now I would have been an even greater force!! I didn’t know then that I could run more than a lap back then. As I grew older I saw glimpses of it and obviously I learned how (while I was in the Army) to run longer distances but I never enjoyed it, until now.

So here I go, again. It took me a minute to get here but hopefully with Kobi’s help I’ll stick around a little longer.

First of Many

Death has a way of changing you forever. Just over a month ago someone I cared about went to be with Jesus. It was so unexpected we were all so shocked. Many of us still are in some sort of disbelief. He was a runner. A pretty darn good one at that, in fact he had qualified to run in the Boston Marathon in 2019. So you can see what I mean when I say he was a good runner!

When I found out he went to be with Jesus after the ugly cry I had on my apartment floor. I went for a run. I was all alone and didn’t want to begin mourning his passing in negative ways or just my usual emotional eating ways… so I grabbed my key card and went to my apartment gym and got on the treadmill (cause running outside while Black at night wasn’t gonna happen).

While running, I was listening to worship music and I got the idea to run a marathon in my friend’s honor. So I decided right then, that this bucket list item to run a marathon would actually become a reality. Especially because it was always just an idea that sounded good, but like I said, death has a way of changing your life so I decided it’s time to make it happen.

I say all that to give you context of why what I did today was so big for me! I ran my first official race! I got a race bib and everything. It was only two miles, but I have to start somewhere before I can get better. I had two goals: finish before 30 minutes (22:58) and don’t walk, and I completed both! I know this will be the first of many and I’m excited for what 2019 and beyond will hold for me!

brown girl, white guy, Spanish girl after a fun run.
Me at my very first official race with Cookie and Pilar. 12/29/18

Whole 30 Results and Triggers

Originally this was suppose to be separate posts but life just wouldn’t allow for such things. Therefore I am writing it all together! 

During the whole 30 I ended up losing 9 pounds and a lot of inches. I’m bad at math but there will be pictures for you to see. I started at 158 and now weigh 149! I haven’t seen a 140 something since l got out of the Army, so to say that I am stoked is an understatement!! 


When I reintroduced dairy, honestly it was kind of lackluster.  The flavor I had craved wasn’t there. On the plus side, my stomach didn’t hurt, although I did get a little gassy after finishing almost a pint of Halo Top ice cream, but I think that had more to do with what time I ate it, because it was like 9 at night! 

This past Friday I reintroduced gluten because I was ready for some deep dish pizza! William took me to IHOP for pancakes and they were fantastic, but they put me to sleep for a couple of hours! Later that night we went to go get pizza and all was well, I didn’t get tired like I did with the pancakes but later on the drive home and that night my back began to hurt in that all too familiar way that I hadn’t felt for 30 plus days! 

Apparently the gluten at least the kind in pizza crust and probably other breads, and maybe pastas are what have been causing a good majority of my back pain! I couldn’t believe it! It might also be the kind that are in cakes and cookies too. I don’t know, and I’m a little hesitant to try and figure it out because I don’t want to be in pain if I don’t have to be. But at least I know how my body reacts to certain food groups and now I can see if they are worth keeping in my regular every day diet! 

Technically I still have 2 more reintroductions to do, non grain gluten like rice, and quinoa and then legumes but I’m pretty much done. I may have a thing of rice or quinoa with dinner to see what happens and maybe wait a day and have some peanut butter or beans but I don’t really eat those two groups that often, so I’m not really worried about how they affect my body and I’m tired of stressing out about what I can and can’t eat! 

Would I do the Whole 30 again, probably not, but will I take what I learned with me, and live a Whole 30 ish lifestyle with occasional resets when needed? Absolutely!

So close yet so far away

Monday will be my last day of the whole 30!! However I still have 10 days of reintroduction to do afterwards. I’m so excited to be done, the temptations to binge is huge! Walking through the grocery store has been torture! I just think knowing that I can have treats is making me a little crazy! 

I had a goal to drink more water, and workout every day this week. I worked out but my water intake was hit or miss. It’s hard to drink water when it gets cold, but I tried. My back is also starting to hurt more than it did, but I think that’s a combination of the weather, my workouts, and clearing out boxes. 

Lots of food
Some of the food I made this week.

I made chili this week, a huge salad, some roasted veggies, as well as zuppa toscana soup tonight and it was so good. I had two bowls! The chili was okay for not having any beans and having veggies in it, but I definitely prefer the soup! 

This has been a struggle. The benefits have been nice but I enjoy food! I have learned some good habits and I think once I reintroduce foods and see how they affect my body it will help me to determine the way I want to pursue eating in the future and what I absolutely need in my life and what I can live without.

Thanks for all of the support throughout this journey. It’s much appreciated!