One month already!

I have tried doing laundry, working out, cleaning dishes, washing my hair, running errands, watching television and even perusing Facebook and I still can’t get over the fact that it’s been one whole month since my baby Kiwi Hannah was born and went to be with Jesus!

It’s so hard to continue on with daily life and activities when I know that I am missing a huge part of my life! I want to scream, and cry and throw things and drink that whole bottle of wine that is currently in my fridge but even then she won’t be back and I won’t feel any better… so instead I’m just sitting here bitter really not wanting to talk to anyone or do anything yet still asking Holy Spirit to come and comfort my heart.

I know that this is going to be a lifetime journey of learning to live without a part of me and therefore won’t be easy, and right now this sucks! I know it won’t alway be like this and I know that through all of my emotions God’s grace is sufficient!

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2 thoughts on “One month already!

  1. lauren says:

    I just wanted to stop by and say i know your pain all to well the week you lost your baby kiwi. I too had just lost my babies, two days prior and was released from the hospital. I know how hard it is. And how hard it will be. But i have faith and its getting better everyday. I have the scars on my belly to remind me of the pain i went to and as they heal amd get lighter i hope the same for my heart and for you as well!!!

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