Respect Takes Practice

I ran across this a few days ago on peacefulwife.com and absolutely loved it and thought it would be just perfect for a “Wifely Wednesday” moment!! I hope you enjoy it and can use some of these phrases to better your marriage. Be Blessed.

Some great respectful phrases – IF you use them sincerely:
– Whatever you think is best.
– I trust you.
– I appreciate your wisdom.
– Thanks for being the leader in our relationship. I appreciate you carrying that heavy responsibility so well.
– I know you’ll do what is right in God’s sight.
– You’ll make the right decision!
– I believe in you!
– I am so proud of you!
– You’ve totally got this!
– You are the BEST father/husband/engineer/son/teacher…
– You did a great job!
– You’ll do a great job!
– I LOVE being your girl!
– I LOVE being married to you.
– There is nowhere else I’d rather be than here.
– Thank you for the honor of allowing me to be your wife!
– I’m so happy here with you.
– I can’t wait to see you!
– I can’t wait to feel your big, strong arms around me tonight!
– You have amazing ideas.
– Thank you!  You are SO generous/thoughtful/wonderful.
– Thanks for taking such good care of me.
– Thank you for being such a wonderful provider for our family.
– Your influence is so important on our children.  Thank you for being such a godly, loving, involved dad.
– I appreciate you having my back with disciplining the children.
– I admire your patience/the way you forgive so easily/your work ethic/your people skills/your wisdom/your humility/your perspective on life.
– I want to get your advice/opinion/perspective on something important.
– What do you think we should do?
– What would you like me to focus on?
– What would you like me to stop doing?
– How do you suggest we handle this situation?
– What a fantastic idea!
– You are so smart!
– It’s great having a big, strong man like you around!
Remember, wives, your tone of voice, your facial expressions and body language also need to be pleasant and friendly as you say these to communicate true respect!
Also
  • More words are not better with men the way they are with women.  Only use maybe one or two of these phrases per day, maybe even just one every other day at times.  Too much will seem insincere or like flattery and not seem real.
  • Respectful SILENCE can be more powerful than words.  It has to be respectful silence, not pouty silence, not the cold shoulder.  If your man shuts down – he either needs an apology for your apparent disrespect or he needs some time to cool down.  If he leaves the room or tries to end the conversation – please DO NOT keep talking and trying to force him to work through the conversation to a “resolution.”  That is not how he works.  That is what you want.  It’s a great goal, but if he leaves, he is saying, “I feel so angry and disrespected that I need to leave to protect you from my anger.”  Following him around the house or out to the garage or constantly texting him trying to MAKE him talk is EXTREMELY disrespectful.  Men do not do that to each other.  If he has had enough, you may apologize, or give him some time to process.  It takes men at least 8 more hours than women to process a lot of emotion.  Giving him time and quiet may actually draw him to you in time.
  • Explanations often come across as disrespect.  If you tell your husband what you think/want/feel/desire and he says no, be VERY careful about the temptation to try to explain yourself.  You think if you add more words to the situation, he’ll understand your position and change his mind.  After one time of expressing yourself, he probably already understands your position and if you continue to try to change his mind when he has already answered – it is very disrespectful and will seal your fate that he will not do what you have asked just because of your disrespectful approach.
  • Respect does not offer “help” when someone didn’t ask for help.  This is a REALLY tough concept for women.  Because we think we are being loving by pitching in without being asked to help.  But men usually take unsolicited help as being disrespectful, as implying that we don’t think they are competent and capable of doing something on their own.  Trusting your man to handle things and showing you have faith in him is respectful.  He will ask for your help if he needs it.
Advertisements

6 thoughts on “Respect Takes Practice

  1. Jean says:

    I think that if we would speak up for wives as much as we speak up for husbands, maybe we would see more love and cooperation in relationships. It leaves a bitter taste in a woman’s mouth when she sees websites that are trying to teach women how to behave, but there is noinstruction for men. We must remember that men are mortal and are sinners just like women.
    Be careful that we honor God’s word.

    • I completely agree with you we have to make sure that we are following God’s word above all else. It’s not just one sided in a marriage and it definitely takes both the husband and the wife to work towards a common goal.

  2. Kitten says:

    A loving honoring husband who gives his life for his wife as God instructed, shouldn’t feel the need to say nov when his wife tells what she thinks, desires, wants, and how she feels.
    And she as a wife is not doing something wrong to offer help to her. Husband. I am confused as to why you feel that a wife cannot be herself with her husband.

    • I don’t think I ever said that a wife cannot be herself with her husband. I simply found great ways to keep the communication open between husband and wife with respect being the key. So many times I find myself not responding in an appropriate way to my own husband so why not share what I’ve found helpful with others. I do apologize if you didn’t find these tips as helpful as I would have hoped. But I hope you can see my heart and encouraging intentions!

      • Jean says:

        I don’t mean to come across as an argumentative or rude person. But I am so concerned with the abundance of websites that browbeat women/ wives. We have too many marital websites where the women site owners, write articles to women, that gives stressful advice to the wife to be careful how she breathes or walks, or talks, or even her mood, lest she comes across as being disrespectful. That’s a lot of stress on women.
        God did not design a wife to be fearful of her husband, where she has to worry about his fragile ego on every turn, Wives are warm, breathing, thinking, vital human beings with needs, wants, and desires just like their husbands. There is more of à need to write to wives about some more important topics more so than telling her that she has to stress herself over whether she is disrespecting someone who is only a man. God gives husbands an awesome task of being a servant leader to his wife and that of loving, honoring, trusting in her, listening her to opinions, valuing her and then giving himself for her as Christ gave himself for the Church.

        But for some reason, Biblical website women think that they need write long articles about the respect factor. There is so much more that goes on in a marriage, because everything is not always about the husband. Wives have so many burdens on their minds and their bodies. maybe we could help marriages by getting some men to write some articles that lecture husbands, the way we do wives.

        I read God’s Word and I study it. I know that there is more to a marriage than telling wives to stress out over respect.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s