My flesh had to die

They walked in for refreshing but all I felt was jealousy.

They came to seek the Lord yet all I could do was think, I’m not the only one anymore.

How could they know that their very presence would enact in me so many insecurities.

They couldn’t. They shouldn’t.

My flesh had to die.

In that moment it had to die because

Jealousy is the #1 killer of all women to women relationships.

There was 7 of them all women of color,

all beautiful, all different yet the same

because they came in seeking a common goal and they loved the Lord!

So why is it that my flesh rose up so high;

because the devil is a lie.

For so long I yearned to have people near me that looked similar to me;

that were at least a close shade of mahogany like me…

and in they walk.

My flesh had to die.

They were all different shades of the brown color scheme

and they were beautiful unlike any others I had ever seen.

My flesh had to die,

and as soon as it did I began to see that there

were actually 8 beautiful women of color and one of them was me,

all shades of the brown color scheme,

some with hair like mine and some not, but we are all sisters pursuing the same goal:

love Jesus and seek after God.

My flesh had to die and this is me repenting…

Father God please forgive me for I have sinned against my sisters I allowed my flesh to rise up. Thank you for killing my flesh before it grew out of control. Help me to continue to die to my flesh when it comes up again and again because it will. In Jesus’ Name Amen.

written on 3/1/11 by Terri A. Harding

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