Today I got up and got dressed even looked pretty cute… and still it doesn’t change the fact that my Kiwi Hannah isn’t here. I miss her so much! I have began praying for more children to be bestowed upon my husband and me sooner rather than later.
Even though i want to be mad at God because I don’t quite understand why this happened to me and my husband, I realize that He answered my prayers… I’ve waited 5.5 years to have a baby, to be a mother, to experience pregnancy and to finally have a baby bump!
Throughout my entire pregnancy albeit it was only 18 weeks the Lord kept Kiwi safe and sound even through traveling to and from India! When she was born she was exactly where she was supposed to be for being 18 weeks old, all her fingers and toes were there, her limbs were long and lean she had my nose and her dad’s lips… she was absolutely perfect!
Never in a million years did I think to pray for my body to hold up. But I prayed for my baby to be safe and healthy and that’s exactly what she was… I miss her today but I’m looking forward to and praying for her siblings that I will one day hold and bring home and raise to be God-fearing adults.
Today my heart is heavy but one day, with God’s help and the help of my friends and family it will be light again and more joyful.
hisloveisreal 